??? - Day 2
Still thinking... maybe by lunch? we'll see...
The only thing happening that I haven't written about is that Ms.SoonToBeBlue started packing up her room yesterday wearing huge doggie slippers. ...3 1/2 more weeks and she'll be dumping the slippers for combat boots...
EDITED 12:04
There's so much going on inside of me right now, I'm not sure I want to write about it because I don't really want to deal with it and I sure as heck don't want to feel it... I am so proud of her, and this is so... well, so HER. And I'm scared (scared? beyond terrified) and excited and ...on and on and on... gosh, do I remember what it was like to just have 2 kids in the house? it's been 15 years since I got to experience THAT. Which means I'll have more money. And less to cook. Less toilet paper to buy. Heck, less maxi-pads to buy... Except after this next round of taxes I won't have her for a dependent which means more taxes, that sucks... She has ALWAYS been so helpful around the house, truly my right arm, and BabyGirlDD just hasn't got the knack of remembering not to put a white washrag in the wash with black work clothes... we'll have to do something about that really soon I guess. She is so excited she's on fire. She looks beautiful. She's dropped 2 pants sizes from the exercising and running... I know it won't be long and she'll be different, grown, what am I going to do when I can't hug her, see her, touch her, kiss her goodnight? I can't think about all of this without feeling truly sick. And I've really (or so I thought) been avoiding thinking about it, even though it is all there inside of me waiting until she gets on the plane so I can finally have a really good cry about it all... This year has gone by too fast.
The only thing happening that I haven't written about is that Ms.SoonToBeBlue started packing up her room yesterday wearing huge doggie slippers. ...3 1/2 more weeks and she'll be dumping the slippers for combat boots...
EDITED 12:04
There's so much going on inside of me right now, I'm not sure I want to write about it because I don't really want to deal with it and I sure as heck don't want to feel it... I am so proud of her, and this is so... well, so HER. And I'm scared (scared? beyond terrified) and excited and ...on and on and on... gosh, do I remember what it was like to just have 2 kids in the house? it's been 15 years since I got to experience THAT. Which means I'll have more money. And less to cook. Less toilet paper to buy. Heck, less maxi-pads to buy... Except after this next round of taxes I won't have her for a dependent which means more taxes, that sucks... She has ALWAYS been so helpful around the house, truly my right arm, and BabyGirlDD just hasn't got the knack of remembering not to put a white washrag in the wash with black work clothes... we'll have to do something about that really soon I guess. She is so excited she's on fire. She looks beautiful. She's dropped 2 pants sizes from the exercising and running... I know it won't be long and she'll be different, grown, what am I going to do when I can't hug her, see her, touch her, kiss her goodnight? I can't think about all of this without feeling truly sick. And I've really (or so I thought) been avoiding thinking about it, even though it is all there inside of me waiting until she gets on the plane so I can finally have a really good cry about it all... This year has gone by too fast.
posted by Kim at 8:21 AM
8 Comments:
DID YOU TAKE A PICTURE??? That is so cute!!!! Hang in there girl remember we are here.
Oh Kim, that had to be rough. We're here for ya. :o)
ooooooooooooooooo mannnnnnn you want to take a couple of mine,, here would be the scary thing to me,, one less person to keep the dumb guy away from me. being alone with HIM and tring not to kill him is what scares me. Just roll with it for now, slip into her excitment and just ride it out.
The emotions you are feeling must be so overwhelming. Go ahead...feel them, write about them...whatever it takes to get through this. We are here for you. Love ya, Girl...
You cry all you want mama. You do what you need to do.
Just write Kim ..if its here or a letter to her. I write him everyday ..almost. I went on the militarymoms.net site last night and I had to leave. There are worse off than us. I wish I could tell you it gets easier. I think you just learn to hold it in better. I am here for you.
Linda
*sigh* That's gotta be so hard. Nothing I say will make it better, just know I'm here.
Now you've made me sad....and I'm giving it back to you. How dare you make me all sad and watery eyed for you?
hmmmm..How's the quit smoking thing going?
There's something to cry about.
Post a Comment
<< Home