Traffic Report!

Ms.Blue is turning 19 in a matter of days.
She left me a voice message yesterday that went something like this:

"Moooooo. Mooooooo."
"Moooooo. Mooooooo."

I didn't know the AF turned children into Cows!

Mr.SoonToBeBlue is turning 18 shortly thereafter.
He decided last night that he was old enough to say TheF-Word in front of his parents. TWICE. Eight seconds apart. ...About a heartbeat later he discovered exactly how wrong that decision was.

The youngest doodlebug is having a birthday right around that same time too. She's apparently inherited her mother's countdown gene because the last several weeks conversations have been something like this.

LilDD "62 days until I turn 16"
LilDD "58 days until I turn 16"
LilDD "37 more days!"
LilDD "29 days!"
LilDD "28 days!"
LilDD "27 days!"
ME: "Did you ask permission to turn 16? You know, it isn't going to happen without my permission. I brought you into this world and I certainly can keep you from turning 16."
LilDD "26 days!"
ME: "hmmm... you get that permission yet? I don't think it's going to happen."

nothing
nothing

and then yesterday...
LilDD "...Mom? May I have permission to turn 16?"
ME: "I don't think so. Ask me again later" (should have been more specific)
LilDD "Mom may I have permission to turn 16?"
ME: "NO. Ask me another day."

I swear... If I really do survive having three teens at the same time, it's going to be a miracle!

Gone & Done It!

Well... believe it or not I came out of the Blogger'sWitnessProtectionProgram for about five minutes this morning! XYZLawFirm had a thing with ABCLawFirm where Stacy works. So this morning I got to meet her and she's even more beautiful and wonderful that comes across in her writing. Out of all the blogs I read or have read, she and I probably have more in common than anyone I've met since moving to the South, except for the fact that she's a real Southern Girl! It was fun.

Yes, she met the sec (who was dessed for casual Friday like we both were). In fact, the sec had been flitting around the office the whole time Stacy was here, and came up and interrupted our conversation in order to introduce herself! Can you believe that she(sec) has been lying to her(Stacy) on the phone for about a month?

Anyway, I'm so totally excited about getting to meet Stacy. What a treat! :)

It's A Small World After All...

LOL!
I can't wait to meet you tomorrow Stacey! I remember when we emailed but never guessed you'd be at a firm we'd actually do business with. Sure surprised me when you told me who you were when I was calling for something else today :).

Can't imagine what the sec will be wearing tomorrow. Today she's in a jeans mini with slits clear up the yazoo and her boobs hanging out in all their splendor. You just wait. If you're lucky, you may even get to hear her snort!!

*Sniffle...

Did you catch the beginning of DealornoDeal last night?

...I was cooking dinner when it came on. LilDD hollered that there was a BlueGirl on there. I had to stop & watch... I started bawling. Of course it was the uniform and the makeup and the way she had to wear her hair, but she was there and Ms.Blue wasn't and it reminded me of my Ms.Blue so much I cried and cried the whole time she was on. It wasn't long before DH came home and walked in with the typical manly, "Why in the HELL are you crying?" She was cute though. Almost as cute as my Ms. Blue.

Countdown.

59 days 22 hours 25 minutes and
MS.Blue WILL BE HOME :) :) :) :)

That very same day, Mr.SoonToBeBlue will be 18.

(sigh)

Not Quite Right...

I know this Lady who's as southern as they come. Steeped in tradition, this aged Scarlett called me yesterday to let me know her husband's sister had passed away. So I rushed over on my lunch hour today, in the proper southern style, unannounced, bearing food and a sympathy card. It was the first time in my eight years of living in the south that I had managed to accomplish such a feat. Not only had I planned it out to the tiniest detail of making the escape without leaving any of us feeling awkward, I even managed to remember that the family was dieting and made sure I carried favorites that had been mentioned on previous occasions as being allowed on such diet. (I actually had to ASK some southern women a while back the proper way to do this food delivery thing, because it was all greek to me!). I pulled it off. I was so darn proud of myself, I sang with the radio all the way back to work. I did it right. Then, a block from the office, I realized what I had done that was terribly wrong. I can just hear the Lady snickering about it now...

"...She's wearing WHITE after Labor Day!"

(sigh)

Maybe I'll never get it right? ;)

Dip It Good!

Yesterday we were in a rush and I wasn't cooking, so we took the kids out for some mexican food. While we were sitting there, a rather large sized woman (the size of a couple of Volkswagons) came in with another large lady (bigger than the whole booth we were sitting in) and a young man the size of a pencil. They giggled and flirted with the waiter...who might not have understood them when they asked what was good to eat because (and I quote) "They've never done this before and have no idea what to order from the menu... Not that I was eavesdropping or anything because that would of been totally rude, but they were right in my line of sight and every time one of the kids moved, bling! There were the gruesome threesome. The smaller of the women waddled over to the restroom. The man sauntered over to the mensroom about the same time. The big woman sat there by herself. Dip.CrunchCrunchCrunch.Dip.CrunchCrunch. DipCrunchCrunchCrunch.DipCrunch. They were gone and she was double-dipping her chips in the community salsa!! Bad Bertha. Bad Bad Bad.

Hellova Couple Weeks!

It's been a crazy couple of weeks.
I've mentioned what we've been dealing with about Ms.Blue and SIL, but as always, there's much more LOL. Today the sec called me Ms.It. I wanted to slap the bitch. I rarely dislike someone. I'm easy to get along with. Avoid friction and drama at all costs. Life's too short. But if I ever thought I didn't like the last gal, I cannot stand this one. She rubs me the wrong way with her snorts and getting up into my business all of the time. Makes for a long workweek for sure. Oh well. It's just a job, right? ;) I don't know if you read the LA newspaper or not, most likely not. Some friends of mine who are newlyweds were involved in a head-on fatal accident several weeks ago down by Bennet and have been in the burn center in pretty bad shape. They've got a lot of recovering to do but are both being released from the hospital today. I feel horrible for the family of the guy that died but am so glad my friends are both on the mend. They've been in a lot of pain and still have many nightmares to get through on the road ahead... And on top of all of that, one of my best friends has been in the hospital since Thursday last week. I've been up there with her every free minute every day. She's supposed to go home tomorrow but will be off her feet for a couple of months.

Nothing to complain about on the home front though.
Life is freeking peachy.

Rays of Sunshine...

SIL's cancer is in remission.
...knew you'd want to know!

Ms.Blue Goes To Jail...

It's been a very long weekend.

Friday less than 30 minutes after we hung up the phone with my usual saying, "make wise choices this weekend and be careful..." childwithheadupasswhoknowseverything was arrested for underage drinking. Will know shortly how severe her punishment is going to be.